Perry's Night Before Christmas
by PFTones3482
Summary: A Phineas and Ferb version of the classic poem "The Night Before Christmas." Full disclaimer inside. Santa gives Perry exactly what he wants for the holidays. Merry Christmas!


**PERRY'S NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS**

**I don't own the rights to this poem. This amazing poem was originally written by Clement Clarke Moore (as a bedtime story for his kid), and I thought I'd adapt it for Phineas and Ferb, which I also don't own. Some lines from the poem were kept the same, but I changed most to fit with the theme. **

**I've actually had this since February, but obviously I wasn't going to post it then. **

**Hope you like!**

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GENERAL POV

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_T'was the night before Christmas and all throughout the scene_

_Not a creature was stirring but for one monotreme_

Perry darted inside and shook the snow off of his fur, chattering with cold. He'd come in super late from an excess mission that Monogram had given him, and he was beat. Some scientists were insane to be working at practically one in the morning.

Perry trotted into the living room and stared longingly at the Christmas tree, and all the presents beneath it. He wanted more than anything to give the kids presents, but Monogram had declared it too risky after a dog had done just that and been discovered by his owner…former owner.

He sighed. Santa Clause was real. Perry had met him, the kids had met him. Why couldn't he just leave a present and say it was from Santa? But noooooo. Monogram didn't believe Santa existed, despite having practically met him.

_The stockings were hung by the chimney quite plain_

_Waiting for visits from Santa, Clewn't, and Blaine._

Perry barely looked at the stockings as he started for the stairs. What was the point? He wouldn't get to do anything with them.

He tiptoed up the stairs, glancing down only when he was on the landing. A dim glow from the tree lights cascaded up the stairs, bathing Perry's face in soft light.

He smiled briefly and headed down the hall.

_The children were nestled all snug in their beds_

_While wrenches and busting danced in their heads._

_And Ma in her nightgown and Pa in his specs_

_Had just settled down for a few hours rest._

Perry walked as quietly as he could past all the rooms. He knew Linda and Lawrence were beat. They never went to bed before midnight on Christmas Eve. And Candace…if the girl got up she would never go back to sleep.

He slid into Phineas and Ferb's room and crawled under the covers with Phineas, finally getting the chance to warm his cold webbed feet.

He settled down into the crook of Phineas' arm and closed his eyes, ready for a well-deserved rest.

_When up in the air there arose such a clatter,_

_Perry sprang to his feet to see what was the matter._

_Away to his head his fedora took flight_

_And he raced down the stairs and into the night._

_The moon on the breast of the trampled down snow_

_Gave way to the platypus slip-sliding below._

Perry almost fell flat on his face as he tried to keep his footing under him. Why, oh why had Isabella insisted on making a figure skating rink?

And what the heck was going on out here?

Perry finally caught himself on a snow-covered hydrangea bush and he glanced around nervously.

_When what to his wondering eyes should appear_

_But a jet powered sleigh and not one single deer_

_With 3 little drivers so lively and fluent_

_He knew it was Santa and of course Blaine and Clewn't._

_Faster than airplanes at the speed of light_

_Santa leaned out and called to all were in sight:_

"_The lights on, the lights on, get them on quick!_

_Hurry up now, these rooftops are slick!_

_To the top of the porch, to the top of the wall,_

_Turn them on, turn them on, turn them on all!"_

Perry spun around, almost losing his footing under him. To his amazement, Santa was right. There weren't lights on at any house, save for the Christmas trees and menorahs inside some of the homes.

He stood quickly, gripping his hat with his hand in determination.

_Faster than leaves that before the wild hurricane fly_

_Perry, faced with an obstacle, leapt to the sky_

_Up to the housetop, his fingers they flew_

_Plugging in lights, red, green, and blue._

_And then in a twinkling he made them all light_

_Perry was cold, but the colors lit up the night._

Perry shivered and rubbed his paws together rapidly, trying to generate heat in them as he jumped off the roof and admired the colorful spectacle.

Across the street, the Garcia-Shapiro house lit up with twinkling lights, and a dazzling menorah filled the front window. Pinky looked over at Perry from the house and waved, a grin on his face. Perry waved back and glanced around.

All over the street, lights came on, powered only by the secret agent animals living in the houses. Perry grinned and looked up, seeing Santa circling the house.

_Perry slipped on inside and started turning around_

_And then down the chimney Santa came with a bound._

_He gave Perry a smile that went cheek to cheek_

_And he dusted his shoes with a sound little "squeak!"_

_He opened the toy bag slung on his back_

_And gestured the platypus to where he was at._

Perry hesitantly stepped over to Santa. He'd met him, of course, and liked him, but he wasn't actually sure what was going on.

He stopped in front of Santa nervously and sized him up.

_His eyes, how they twinkled, his dimples how merry_

_His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry._

_He opened his mouth drawn up in a bow_

_And rustled his beard, still white as snow._

_He pulled out the pipe he held clutched in his teeth_

_And coughed away smoke that looked like a wreath._

_He pulled in his gut and held in his belly,_

_But at Perry's expression it shook out like jelly._

_Though chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf_

_Perry kept his face neutral in spite of himself._

Perry bit back his grin, trying his hardest to keep from laughing at the sight of Santa, crouched over on the floor and grinning as if Perry had just told the funniest joke he'd ever heard.

He shook his head in amusement and looked back up to Santa, raising an eyebrow.

_A wink of his eye and a twist of his noggin _

_Made Perry look in at the trains and toboggans._

Perry looked up at Santa from the sack and shrugged, not sure what the man was implying. Santa gave a small smile to Perry and began reaching into his bag.

Perry glanced over at the stockings, still hanging empty, and he tugged on Santa's sleeve nervously. The kids weren't getting nothing, were they?

He pointed to the stockings, but Santa just smiled and shook his head.

_He spoke not a word but went straight to his work_

_He put the toys on the floor and then turned with a jerk._

_He laid a finger to his rosy lips _

_And waved a hand over the messy room's fix. _

Perry glanced around the room, noting that the toys and boxes were scattered around the floor, rather than under the tree or in the stockings.

He glanced up at Santa, confused.

Santa reached into his pack and pulled out three boxes, handing them to Perry. Perry almost protested, his hands rising up to push the packages away, when he recognized the wrapping.

The platypus immediately took the packages and stared at them. Sure enough, each had one of the kids name's on it…written in his handwriting.

Perry looked around again and his eyes widened. He whirled around to face Santa, only to find that he was gone.

_Santa ran to his sled and drove out of sight_

_Allowing Perry to give all the presents that night. _

Perry grinned as he tucked a screwdriver into Ferb's stocking and a wrench into Phineas' before placing his own presents for the kids under the tree.

Somehow, in a way that he would never figure out, the handwriting on the packages had changed from his to Santa's. No matter what Monogram would try to say, his secret would stay safe.

Santa had given him what he wanted most for Christmas: a chance to give the kids presents, even if they didn't know they were from him.

Perry stood and headed for Candace's stocking, and he couldn't help it.

_The platypus grinned, happy as could be._

_And then he heard Santa shout, "Merry Christmas, Agent P!"_

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**Hope you enjoyed, guys, even if you don't celebrate Christmas. **

**Merry Christmas, Happy (belated?) Hanukkah, Happy Kwanza, and Happy New Year! I will probably udate once or twice before January, and then I'll try to stick to my resolution this year of writing stories not just for Phineas and Ferb. (I will stick to it, despite what that guy told Doofenshmirtz)**

**R and R, and have a happy holidays with your friends and family!**


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